The twins
by RizaMustang24
Summary: As Kaoru realizes that Haruhi is taking Hikaru away he's trying to hold on for as long as he can to Hikaru... but once all is said and done Hikaru actually develops feelings for the fading Kaoru. But what happens when Kaoru develops an issue? Multicoupled
1. Are You Gay?

"Hikaru?" Haruhi finally spoke up. Haruhi had short brown hair because of a gum incident in middle school. She was what you'd call a "commoner".

"Yes, Haruhi?" Hikaru responded, some of his orangish hair going into his eyes. It was his and his twins hairstyle for the week, sleek in back, shaggy in front.

"Are you and Kaoru... really," Haruhi blushed for the first time as she scrambled for the words. "Are you and Kaoru really gay?"

Hikaru blushed and stood up and walked off to the side of the room and leaned on another table.

_I hope she didn't see me blush, _Hikaru thought embarassed.

"Hikaru?" Haruhi asked worridly. "It was just a question. Are you?"

"Hikaru!" A boy identical to Hikaru called as he ran up to him. "Are you and Haruhi done having your conversation?"

"Kaoru!" Hikaru smiled and his blushed dissapeared. "Of course!"

"What was it about?" Kaoru whispered devilishly.

"Nothing!"

"It doesn't sound like nothing,"

"It's nothing."

"Are you two sexually abusing your sister again?" The 'King' of the Club asked putting his hand on Haruhi's shoulder. Haruhi looked up at him. The couch was kind of high, so the guy wasn't much taller than Haruhi at the moment.

"Tamaki-Senpai, Hikaru and I were just talking," Haruhi responded for the twins.

"Oh, sorry Haruhi!" Tamaki blushed his blonde hair ruffled a bit. "I didn't realize..."

"Tamaki-kun? Where did you go?" A female voice called. A girl in the Ouran school uniform came over and smiled. "Ah, Tamaki-kun, I was worried that something had happened. But you're just over here with Haruhi-kun!"

"When are we gonna tell them?" The twins whispered to Tamaki.

"Not now, I don't think the others would approve of her being here if they knew," Tamaki replied whispering.

"But you're father and Kyouya's already know," Hikaru and Kaoru defended. "Besides, wouldn't you get to spend more time with Haruhi if they all knew? Besides..." The twins walked over and lounged on the couch with their arms around Haruhi. "We get a lot of time alone with Haruhi."

Tamaki blushed and cursed, "Devilish idiots..."

"We're closed today ma'am," A man with short black hair smiled at the lady who came over looking for Tamaki. "Could you please leave?"

"Of course, Kyouya-senpai!" The girl blushed as she ran out of the music room.

"Ahh, Haruhi-chan..." The twins rambled. Tamaki glared jealous.

"Mom! They're abusing our daughter!" Tamaki whined to Kyouya.

"Oh, so I'm 'mom' again?" Kyouya sighed. "Look, Kaoru and Hikaru are Haruhi's classmates, they're just acting like they do in the classroom."

"I will not have my daughter hanging out with these... idiots!" Tamaki whined pointing to the grinning twins hugging Haruhi. "Let go of my daughter!"

"But we don't wanna..." The twins smiled hanging onto Haruhi's shoulders.

"Rich bastards..." Haruhi whispered under her breath.

"Hikaru? You never answered me," Haruhi replied walking next to the twins.

"What? What didn't you answer Hikaru?" Kaoru asked curiously looking at his twin.

"Ahhh, it's nothing," Hikaru blushed rubbing the back of his head. "It's nothing, nothing!"

"What's wrong Hikaru?" Haruhi asked more worried.

"It's nothing!" Hikaru laughed, his face getting a little red.

"Sounds like nothing..." Kaoru lied looking away pouting.

_He never tells me anything... _Kaoru thought in his head pouting.

"Ahhh, Takashi! It's Haru-chan!" A little blonde boy exclaimed running up to the three pulling a man with a real short cut hairdue that was black. He looked kind of scary, but with the company of the boy he didn't look so scary, he looked handsome even.

"Hunny-sempai!" Haruhi laughed kneeling down to look into Hunny's eyes. She looked up at the man with black hair. "How are you Mori-sempai?"

"I'm doing fine, Haruhi," Mori replied quietly.

"Hehe," Haruhi giggled and Hikaru's face went red.

"So, what did Haruhi ask you?" Kaoru urged.

"None of your bussiness!" Hikaru snarled a bit. Then he stopped noticing Kaoru's expression and he pulled Kaoru into an embrace. "I'm sorry Kaoru, that was careless. As the older brother that was foolish."

"Hikaru..." Kaoru blushed. "To hug me in public like this..."

"I'm sorry, Kaoru," Hikaru sighed holding his brother close.

"That's what I mean," Haruhi stated standing up. "There's no one around to see you two act like this yet you do it anyway, and you said you sleep in the same bed together too?"

"What does she mean?" Kaoru asked a little more serious.

"It's nothing really," Hikaru sighed letting go of Kaoru and standing tall and firm looking at Haruhi.

"But you never answered my question," Haruhi urged again.

"It's none of your business!" Hikaru snarled and turned away. "Why should it matter to you anyway?"

"Because I know almost everything else about you two, just not the answer to that one question," Haruhi replied pointing to Hikaru then Kaoru. "I'm curious."

"Well stop being curious!" Hikaru snapped running off.

"Hikaru!" Kaoru shouted reaching his hand after him then starting to run but was stopped by Haruhi's hand on his elbow. Kaoru looked back at her and stopped and stood still. "So what did you ask Hikaru?"

"I was just curious, are you two gay?" Haruhi explained. Hunny and Mori got quiet and started to tip-toe away. "Not to be rude or anything."

"We'll be going..." Hunny and Mori said at the same time and ran towards the music room, ducking behind the door.

"What's wrong?" Tamaki asked walking over to the two, Kyouya walking next to him. "Did something happen between Haruhi and the id-twins?"

"She asked 'the question,'" Hunny gulped.

"Oh no, that question?" Tamaki asked carefully and slowly.

"Apparently, Mori-sempai and Hunny-sempai wouldn't run like that if that's not what it was," Kyouya pointed out pushing his glasses up a little higher on his nose making his glasses shine like that evil little anime glare.

"My daughter!" Tamaki whined. "Mommy!"

"Are we, gay?" Kaoru repeated not looking at Haruhi.

"I don't know, that's why I'm asking," Haruhi replied without any sarcasm in her tone.

"Do you think we're gay, Haruhi?" Kaoru asked a little hurt in his voice.

"I don't know, I was just wondering if it was just brotherly love, an act, or something more than brotherly love. You two never say 'I love you' to eachother so I was wondering what was going on," Haruhi explained a little more precisely.

"I mean, you two do sleep together, right?"

"Yes..." Kaoru answered quietly and looked at Haruhi and smiled. "I'm pretty sure Hikaru doesn't appreciate that question."

"I'm sorry Kaoru," Haruhi apologized a little more quiet. "I didn't think about how you two might take it."

_Does she ever think about that kind of stuff before she talks? _Kaoru wondered a little annoyed but didn't let it show.

"I'm going home for the day, I have a feeling Hikaru's there too," Kaoru announced to the Host Club members waiting impatiently by the door to the music room.

"Oh yes!" Tamaki replied a little tense.

Haruhi smiled and said, "See you later Kaoru!"

"See ya," Kaoru replied walking away.

_Are we gay? I don't know, I mean I never want Hikaru to leave me but he has to sometime doesn't he? I mean, Hikaru seems to be falling in love with Haruhi, isn't that kind of a harsh question to ask us? _Kaoru thought as he sat in his limo staring out at the scenery. _I hope Hikaru's alright..._

"_Welcome to the Ouran High School Host Club._

_My name's Haruhi Fujioka, I'm a freshman here at Ouran and as many would say, a commonor. I'm also called the 'Natural' type of Host._

_Our king of the club is Tamaki Suoh, he's a second year and the leader of the Host Club that is located in the 3rd Music room. Tamaki-sempai is known as the 'Prince' type of Host._

_The organizer and fund manager is Kyouya Ootori, another second year student here. Kyouya-sempai is known as the 'Quiet' type of Host?_

_Our cute little loli-shota is Mitsukuni Haninozuka, a senior even though he doesn't look it. He's also known as Hunny-sempai._

_Here is Takashi Morinozuka, also known as Mori-sempai, he's kind of quiet too. He's a senior as well._

_Then here's the twins you've all been waiting for: Kaoru and Hikaru Hitachiin! They're the 'Devil' type of Host, are both freshman, they're also both in my class._

_So why don't you stop by sometime?" _Haruhi read the flyer she had in her hands.

"Good, good, Haruhi, read it just like that only memorized and make hand motions towards the other Hosts when they come onstage," Kyouya directed Haruhi.

"Yes, Kyouya-sempai," Haruhi sighed letting the paper fall to the floor through her hands. "This is what you closed the Host Club for? So that I could practice reading my speech?"

"Precisely," Kyouya chuckled.

"You don't always have to get so upset, Hikaru, it makes you look possessive, and that's not a kind of rap we wanna get with the students," Kaoru sighed as he walked into his bedroom and layed down on his bed next to Hikaru.

"She asked us if we were gay, Kaoru," Hikaru sighed closing his eyes, his hands behind his head.

"I heard..." Kaoru started putting his head on Hikaru's bare chest and looked at his twins face. "Do you think we're gay?"

"Of course not!" Hikaru quickly responded.

Kaoru looked away and stared at the teapot on the table a few feet away.

_He might not be, but am I? _Kaoru wondered, closing his eyes.

"If you're going to go to sleep at least take off your shirt and pants, you know how uncomfortable it is for both of us to sleep together when you have your shirt AND pants on," Hikaru growled a bit.

"It's better than sleeping with no clothes," Kaoru smiled devilishly.

"Hey, I don't when we're in public!" Hikaru countered blushing, opening his eyes.

"Hehe, but you still don't sleep with clothes on..."

"I do sometimes!" Hikaru countered again pushing Kaoru off the bed. "Geez, stop trying to make me sound gay, Kaoru, we both know we're not."

"How do you know?" Kaoru asked sitting up and walking towards the closet staring inside of it. "How do you know that I'm not?" Kaoru looked back at Hikaru. "How well do you actually know me?"

"Kaoru..." Hikaru whispered sitting up and staring at his brother, one of his arms resting on his knees. "...are you, gay?"

"I don't know!" Kaoru sighed pulling his shirt off.

"Let me get this for you," Hikaru cooed as he quickly dashed over and put his hands on Kaoru's waistband. Kaoru's face went red as Hikaru pulled down his pants leaving him in boxers. "Now can we go to sleep?"

"Sure, Hikaru," Kaoru replied softly, still blushing.

They both climbed into bed and Kaoru snuggled up and rested his head under Hikaru's chin, in the croon of his neck. Hikaru wrapped his arms around his brother and smiled playing with his foot with his own foot and closed his eyes and tried to get to sleep. But that question lingered in his mind. _"Are you and Kaoru really gay?" _

"Kaoru?" Hikaru asked quietly.

The only reply was Kaoru's deep yet soft breathing and he held him close to himself.

"Am I gay?" Hikaru whispered to himself. "I don't know, yet."

"Kaoru? Hikar-" Haruhi and Tamaki started as they opened the door to the twins' bedroom. They stared at the two in the bed snuggling in their sleep. Tamaki blushed and covered his eyes.

"It's one thing at the club, it's another at home," Tamaki stated.

"Kaoru? Hikaru?" Haruhi asked again walking over and sitting on the edge of the bed. "Does this mean you're gay?"

Kaoru stirred and moaned, "Hikaru, it's for you..."

"You get it, Kaoru," Hikaru moaned.

Haruhi sighed.

"I don't think we're gonna get anything out of them," Haruhi complained getting up off of the bed and leaving the room.

After they left Hikaru and Kaoru sat up and looked at the door they left through.

"I wonder, what kissing feels like?" Kaoru asked curiously.

"I've wondered that quite often lately too," Hikaru admitted.

"You'll find out with Haruhi..." Kaoru joked playfully.

Hikaru pinned Kaoru down on the bed playfully.

"Then how will you ever find out?" Hikaru joked laughing.

"I'll find a way..." Kaoru whispered, blushing.

Hikaru rested his head on Kaoru's chest and felt the rythmic pounding and movement of Kaoru's systems working their course. Hikaru closed his eyes. _Am I gay?_

Kaoru sighed and hugged his brother and fell asleep wondering the same question Hikaru was asking.

"Evening!" Kaoru greeted as he stalked into the music room. "Hikaru's sick today, I kept bugging him to let me stay, but he kept telling me over and over again that I needed to go to school."

"At least he cares about your education," Haruhi smiled at him while turning around holding a teapot. "You want some tea?"

"Yeah, you always say you loved commonor's tea!" Tamaki smiled holding his cup up.

"Eh, Hikaru said he loved commonor's tea, I never commented on it..." Kaoru scowled a bit under his breath and sat down at the table to drink some tea.

"So was that an act too?" Tamaki asked quietly.

"I don't know what you're talking about, M'Lord," Kaoru growled.

"Oh, you two in bed together yesterday," Tamaki scowled.

"Here you go Kaoru," Haruhi said as she handed him a cup of tea. Kaoru blushed and took the tea.

_Does Hikaru really like this girl? I can see why if he does, _Kaoru thought as he sipped on the tea.

"Instant tea, right?" Kaoru asked Haruhi setting the tea cup on the table with a _clank_.

"Yeah!" Haruhi blushed. Tamaki's face went red.

"Haruhi! You're so cute!" Tamaki squealed blushing.

"Oh, Kaoru, I made something for Hikaru," Haruhi remembered and walked over to the area where the piano was located and searched around her bag for something. "Here we go."

Haruhi walked over holding something wrapped up in tubberware.

"What's this stuff?" Kaoru asked a little disgusted by the look of the tubberware.

"Oh, stop being so stuck-up in your rich life," Haruhi scolded and handed it to him. "I know how much Hikaru likes spicy stuff and I got his Math homework, he should have fun doing that, shouldn't he?"

Kaoru blushed and whispered with a tint of jealousy, "Yeah."

_Ohh, she annoys me so much, acting like she knows Hikaru so well... _Kaoru scolded himself.

"You're all here early," Kyouya commented as he walked in with Hunny on Mori's shoulders behind him. "Did class end early for you or something?"

"Oh, yeah, class ended early for us and Tamaki must've rushed here or something because he was here first, and isn't he in your class?" Haruhi replied looking at the ceiling thinking. She turned back and looked Kaoru in the eyes. "So what is Hikaru sick with?"

Kaoru winced, _Why does she care about Hikaru so much? What about me? Don't I matter around here?_

Kaoru slammed his hand on the table and he stood up and walked out of the room, everyone stared at him as he walked out the door.

"What's gotten into him?" Tamaki asked worried.

"I don't know, what's wrong with Kaoru-kun, Haru-chan?" Hunny asked nervously holding his pink stuffed bunny close to him.

"I think, he's jealous," Haruhi admitted.

"Kaoru? What are you doing home so early?" Hikaru groaned sitting up in his bed.

"You didn't wear clothes today did you?" Kaoru sighed. "Don't sit up please."

Hikaru layed back down blushing, visibly annoyed. Kaoru walked over and layed on top of the covers of the bed and rolled over to look at his twin. He played lightly with his hair.

"What are you doing home so early?" Hikaru asked struggling to roll over to look in his brothers eyes. "Did something happen?"

"Oh, I was just kind of annoyed with them is all, by the way Haruh-" Kaoru started. Hikaru looked at him oddly.

"Haruhi what?"

Kaoru thought about what to say for a moment.

_I don't want to lie but I don't want to tell the truth either... I guess I'd better tell the truth to make Hikaru happy, _Kaoru thought solemnly.

"Haruhi made you some spicy food and got all your math homework and gave it to me," Kaoru whispered smiling, his hand wincing as he touched his brothers loose strand of hair. "Were you really sick, Hikaru? Or were you trying to avoid Haruhi's question about us?"

"I can't lie to my twin," Hikaru smiled and closed his eyes and moved as close as he could with half of his body under the covers and with the pressure of Kaoru laying on the other end of the blanket. "I didn't know how to respond, I didn't want to seem like I was gay, but I don't really know if I am or not."

"Tell Haruhi that then," Kaoru scowled and got up and walked out of the room. Hikaru sat up and stared out into the empty hallway.

"Kaoru?" Hikaru called.

_Always worried about her... _Kaoru scowled to himself as he walked downstairs and looked into the living room, seeing his mothers designs everywhere, but his mother was no where to be seen. Kaoru walked over to the sofa and sat down and pulled out his Gameboy SP and started playing it, scowling to himself in his mind. _Stupid, stupid Haruhi, everyone paying attention to her..._

"Kaoru?" Hikaru asked worridly as he walked into the living room, he was still pulling on his shirt and he'd forgotten to button his jeans. "Are you alright?"

"Fine," Kaoru snarled turning his game up with his pinky. The noise was loud for a Gameboy, and now all Kaoru payed attention to was the beeping and the small character on the screen.

Hikaru lounged next to his twin and put his arm around him.

"Go right."

"What?"

"Go right, left is the fiery pit," Hikaru explained pointing to the screen.

"Oh."

Hikaru looked at his twins face and frowned. Something was bugging Kaoru, and it included him and Haruhi.

_Does he think we're going out?_ Hikaru wondered, he squeezed Kaoru's shoulder.

"What?" Kaoru pouted.

"Are you okay?" Hikaru purred, pushing his twin down on the couch.

"Fine," Kaoru whined.

Haruhi, Tamaki, and Kyouya watched the two on the couch. They were hyst talking to eachother about the game. Suddenly Hikaru pushed Kaoru over and pinned him

"Why did you bring me along?" Kyouya whined.

"Because this is interesting," Tamaki replied quickly and quietly.

The space between the twins' faces was decreasing slowly. The three budged to hear the words.

"I'm not in the mood, Hikaru," Kaoru said quietly.

"You don't look alright," Hikaru whispered as he got his face closer to Kaoru's.

"I am," Kaoru whispered solemnly, his face was red now.

"Don't like that with me," Hikaru groaned as he got closer.

"I'm not in the mood, Hikaru," Kaoru said quietly.

Hikaru grasped Kaoru's wrist and the Gameboy SP fell across the room.

"Why won't you tell me what's wrong?" Hikaru yelled.

"Nothing's wrong," Kaoru replied quietly. "What makes you assume that I am upset or something like that?"

"I'm your twin," Hikaru snarled.

"Nothing's wrong..." Kaoru sighed trying to free his wrist from Hikaru's grasp. "...nothing's wrong."

Hikaru sighed and got off his brother and went to pick up their Gameboy SP when he noticed the three in the opening.

"Wha-" Hikaru gasped. "How long have you been there?"

"Umm..." Tamaki blushed stepping back. "...we just got here?"

Kaoru saw Haruhi and scowled, his face turning red. He rolled over so he wouldn't have to look at her.

"What's wrong, Kaoru?" Haruhi questioned, concern in her voice, as she tip-toed over to the sofa. She sat down at his feet and his caressed his hand. "Is it me? I noticed you were terribly jealous of something today."

Hikaru suddenly ignored Tamaki and turned to face Haruhi and Kaoru whispering, "Jealous? Jealous of what?"

"Stop talking like you know me..." Kaoru whispered but no one seemed to hear it.

_I hate how she acts..._ Kaoru thought angrily. _I hate how she doesn't even know I hate her._

"I wasn't jealous of anything," Kaoru finally answered softly. He closed his eyes as he focused on Haruhi's hands stroking movements.

_What's this feeling?_ Kaoru thought as he began feeling calm again and his whole body relaxed. Haruhi could feel the hand as the muscles stopped being tense.

Haruhi smiled at Kaoru's relaxed body, she continued stroking his hand.

_Just like a mother? _Kaoru finally figured out what he was trying to think. _I feel this around Hikaru too, so that can't be it..._

"Let's go, Tamaki," Kyouya nagged pulling Tamaki by his ear.

"But my daughter," Tamaki complained.

"Shut-up," Kyouya sighed.

"Haruhi!"

The twins and Haruhi stared at the two leaving. Kaoru suddenly burst out laughing and sat up, leaning his head on Haruhi's shoulder.

"Kaoru?" Hikaru and Haruhi questioned worridly as they stared at Kaoru who was laughing really hard.

"Those two... always know how... to make me laugh...!" Kaoru gasped as he pulled away from Haruhi and layed down again.

"Oh, I see," Hikaru sighed in relief. "I thought something was wrong with you."

_There is something wrong with me!_ Kaoru wanted to scream.

"Yeah," Kaoru sighed as he stared at the ceiling. "I konw what you mean."

_There is something WRONG! Help me!_ Kaoru shouted inside as Haruhi and Hikaru left the room.

"Help me..." Kaoru sobbed as soon as Hikaru and Haruhi left the house. "...help me!"


	2. Relationship Issues Part 1

"Kaoru hasn't talked the whole day!" Hikaru complained to Tamaki. "Do you know what's wrong with him M'Lord?"

Tamaki had a clue, but he wasn't about to share it with Hikaru. It would break his heart into a million pieces. Then the twins would be in the same state.

_He knows what's wrong! _Hikaru thought angrily. _He knows what's wrong wtih Kaoru and he's not telling me! I can handle it!_

"Hikaru?" Haruhi replied shocked as she walked up behind Tamaki. "Why are you with Kaoru? He's all alone out there!"

A knock and crash was heard and Renge fell through the door.

"What's wrong Renge-chan?" Hikaru sighed.

"Kaoru-kun's gone!" Renge shrieked. She was dressed in the usual Ouran uniform, no cosplaying today apparently.

"What?" Hikaru gasped as he pushed past Renge into the music room and searched all around for Kaoru.

"Have you seen Kaoru?" Hikaru begged everyone he ran into.

"No, sorry," Was everyone's reply to the question.

The Club stared in awe at Hikaru's tremendous effort to find his brother. They knew they should be looking too, but Hikaru's affection was awe-inspiring.

"Hikaru?" A familiar voice asked in an amused tone. "What are you doing?"

"Kaoru!" Hikaru turned on his heel and ran to embrace his brother. When they hugged it was wet, but neither twin cared about that. "Where were you?"

"Outside," Kaoru chuckled nuzzling his head into Hikaru's shoulder. "I'm alright now, Hikaru."

Hikaru hugged Kaoru tighter at the sound of his name which made Kaoru smile.

_I know the answer to Haruhi's question, _Kaoru wanted to say to Hikaru. _I can't deny how I feel, I love you, Hikaru._

"I love you..." Kaoru mumered.

No one heard Kaoru's declaration except for himself, he felt alone even with the hundreds of eyes staring at him.

Kaoru sat alone in the kitchen, his head rested on his arms on the table. He looked to asleep if not for teh knife next to him that he was staring at.

_Should I? _Kaoru wondered.

His hand reached out for the knife handle. Once he grasped it, he pulled it in front of his face. Kaoru stared into his reflection on the metal blade, into those sad, alone eyes which he'd been avoiding for weeks.

"Hikaru," Kaoru sobbed as tears began flowing. "why are you leaving me? First mom and dad stop paying attention to me and now you?"

Kaoru slowly brought the knife to his wrist and stopped.

"No, I don't want to do this," Kaoru finally admitted, taking the knife away.

"Kaoru? I thought I heard your voice," Hikaru groaned, walking into the kitchen.

Hikaru was looking for his brother since he woke up in bed alone.

_I've been alone a lot lately, _Hikaru sighed as he stalked to the kitchen.

"No, I... do this," Hikaru struggled to make out the words that came in Kaoru's tone.

"Koaru? I thought I heard your voice," Hikaru groaned as he walked into the kitchen.

"Agh!"

The scream woke up all the nearest maids, they rushed to the kitchen. They all rushed to Kaoru as blood dripped onto the floor.

"I'm so sorry, Kaoru!" Hikaru cried as he tried to pull the knife lodged in his hand out.

Kaoru winced in pain as tears streamed down his face.

"Kaoru," Hikaru sobbed as he caressed his brother's face; the knife wouldn't come out. "What were you doing?"

The words choked in Kaoru's throat as he tried to explain what was wrong. Kaoru leaned his head onto Hikaru's shoulder and sobbed.

"Where's mother?" Hikaru stated, trying to ignore the tears trying to burst from him.

"Your parents are on business trips right now," One of the maids responded.

"Figures," Kaoru mumbled.

Hikaru pushed down Kaoru's hand and tugged at the bloody knife with the other hand. He grunted as his hand slipped on the wet and bloody handle. Little by little the knife unlodged and flew out and Hikaru's hand stuck to the wall as the knife jammed into the wall.

"Hikaru!" Kaoru gasped as he embraced his brother and nuzzled him, sobbing.

"Kaoru," Hikaru whispered as he released the knife and wrapped his arms around his brother. Hikaru kissed his brother's forehead. "are you okay?"

Kaoru sobbed as he felt Hikaru's burning lips on his flesh.

"Young master? Your wound," one of the twin maids replied. "you're bleeding badly."

"It'll need stitches," The other twin maid pointed out, finishing her sister's statement.

"I'm not letting him go!" Hikaru protested, holding his brother closer, their waists touching.

Kaoru snuggled his head into Hikaru's shoulder to hide the intense blush on his face. Hikaru moved his hand down to Kaoru's waist and grinned as the other hand pressed down on Kaoru's back. Hikaru's shirt was blood stained from Kaoru's immense hand wound.

"I won't let them take my brother away," Hikaru cooed into Kaoru's ear.

"But my hand hurts," Kaoru nagged.

"Exactly!" The maids chimed.

_But my heart hurts worse, _both of the twins thought.

Kaoru kissed Hikaru's neck.

"I won't let him go," Hikaru whimpered at the kiss on his neck. Hikaru moved his hand farther to the back of Kaoru's waist. Kaoru blushed and bit Hikaru's neck.

The maids sighed in unision and grabbed Kaoru's bleeding hand and wrapped it up in gaws.

"You klutz," The maids chuckled.

Kaoru licked Hikaru's chin. Both of their faces flushed deep red and they stared into eachother's eyes.

"Kaoru..."

"Hikaru..."

Quickly, Hikaru put the hand that was on Kaoru's waist under his knee caps, and grabbed his shoulders with his other hand. Hikaru lifted him up and held him against his chest.

As they walked up the stairs Kaoru felt the warmth of his brother's chest. Kaoru attempted to match his breathing rate to his twins.

Kaoru felt his head lean on a door as Hikaru struggled to turn the knob. Kaoru struggled to see in the dark of the night. The creak of the door reached Kaoru's ears then felt the softness of the bed on his face.

Kaoru's face flushed again, and he felt his clothes being taken off until he was left in his boxers. Naked arms wrapped around Kaoru's body and he felt breath down his neck.

"Hikaru?" Kaoru whispered as he stroked the back of the person in his bed.

"Kaoru?" Hikaru responded, kissing Kaoru's neck. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Let's just go to sleep."

Hikaru lifted a leg and put it around his brothers and pulled him closer.

"Kaoru..." Hikaru whispered, then everything began going blank.

"I love you," Kaoru whispered to his brother.

Hikaru held his brother so close, it hurt. He thought about what Kaoru had just whispered, it was so quiet it seemed like Kaoru didn't want him to hear about it.

"Hikaru?" Kaoru finally spoke up, shaking his brother. Hikaru grunted as a reply. "Do you love me?"

Hikaru stopped breathing and thinking for a moment. Then he thought again. _Do I love you?_

Hikaru caressed his brother's upper body. _Moer than the sun, more than life. That's how much I love you Kaoru, _Hikaru wanted to confess. _I guess Haruhi's sort of right. I'm not gay though, I'm bisexual._

Hikaru kissed his brother quickly on the lips. When Hikaru pulled away they held eachother again.

"I love you, Kaoru."

"I love you, Hikaru."

"It's too bad, no one can ever know."

The two fell asleep into a peaceful sleep for the first time in months.

That's all I gots for now... err... the next chapter isn't finished, still working on it in my notebook. This one was really Kaoru and Hikaru filled, don't worry, there'll be more Haruhi and the others in the next one... here's part of it to prove it.

_"Kao-kun?" Hunny whined, grabbing Kaoru's hand._

_Kaoru didn't reply, only stared at the two as they kissed._

_"Are you okay?" Hunny whined again, tugging at Kaoru's hand._

_"Y-yeah," Kaoru lied with a smile._

_As okay as I can be, I guess._

_Kaoru stared at his brother, wanting to cry and sob and have Hikaru hold him in his strong arms._

_"Do you love me, like you did yesterday?" Kaoru mumbled._

_"Huh?" The three asked, Kyouya and Mori were holding Tamaki up, Hunny was still holding Kaoru's hand. The three stared at him as Tamaki regained conciousness._

_But all Kaoru saw and heard was what was happening with his beloved twin. His loving brother. HIS Hikaru._

_"I warned you," Kyouya sighed. "That the first date might have developed feelings of love."_

_I knew that, but... Kaoru thought. I just wanted to hold on, a little longer._

_"You said you'd come back," Kaoru whined under his breath. "You promised this morning."_

_"Well, I just see Kaoru as a brother, but I think I'm bisexual."_

_"Oh."_

_As a brother? Hardly. Hikaru scowled himself. But that's OUR secret._

_"Just as a brother?" Haruhi asked, obviously not convinced. It's like she read his mind!_

_"Uh..." Hikaru mumbled, blushing._

_Answer! Or she'll figure it out!_

_"I won't tell," Haruhi giggled as she got up walked away. Quickly she stopped and turned on her heel so she faced Hikaru again. "On one condition."_

_"What condition?" Hikaru whispered._

That's all you're getting


	3. Relationship Issues Part 2 of 2

**Note: This chapter is really long and it seems like it's Mature at the end, but it's not really mature, so don't think something bad is gonna happen. If it did I would've changed the rating. Thank you.**

Kaoru groaned as Hikaru licked the wound on Kaoru's hand. A couple tears went down his face because of the pain.

"I think, it just needs to be wrapped up, Hikaru," Kaoru whined.

Hikaru smirked at the sound of his brothers high, girly voice.

"Hikaru!" Kaoru whined a little louder.

"You need to learn to shut-up," Hikaru giggled, pushing Kaoru down onto their bed. "and let me do the talking."

"...okay."

Hikaru grinned and kissed his brother and let his body relax, laying on top of Kaoru's body. He wrapped his arms around his twins neck as Kaoru put both of his hands on Hikaru's waist and pulled him as close as possible.

They stopped kissing and stared at the door as the twin maids walked in.

"What?" Hikaru snarled.

"Haruhi Fujioka-san is here for you Hikaru-sama," They announced calmly.

Kaoru closed his eyes and clenched his teeth, his throat choked at the sound of her name.

_Haruhi..._ Kaoru growled in his mind.

After the twins left Hikaru kissed Kaoru and their tongues touched.

"I'll be back," Hikaru whispered as he pulled away and walked out of the room.

But Kaoru knew it was a lie from the start, because Hikaru was already gone. He wasn't coming back.

"Just let me hold on a little longer," Kaoru whispered, touching his lips as he sat up. "Don't leave me for good just yet."

"Hey! Wasn't today supposed to be our second date?" Haruhi blushed as Hikaru ran up to her.

"Oh, yeah!" Hikaru chimed, embarassed.

Hikaru grasped Haruhi's hand and pulled her off with him. Haruhi smiled at the smoothness of his hand.

"What kind of music do you like?" Hikaru questioned as he pulled her into a store.

"Oh, lots I guess," Haruhi blushed.

The two laughed and smiled as they browsed the CDs on the racks. Hikaru ended up buying five CDs that they both enjoyed. Then they went to the park. By this time it was one o'clock.

"Haruhi..." Hikaru soothed as he leaned in towards her, holding her hand. "I think I... like you, like you."

"Me too."

Kaoru cringed as he saw the two kiss. Tamaki almost fainted and Kyouya and Mori had to hold back Tamaki's scream.

"Kao-kun?" Hunny whined, grabbing Kaoru's hand.

Kaoru didn't reply, only stared at the two as they kissed.

"Are you okay?" Hunny whined again, tugging at Kaoru's hand.

"Y-yeah," Kaoru lied with a smile.

_As okay as I can be, I guess._

Kaoru stared at his brother, wanting to cry and sob and have Hikaru hold him in his strong arms.

"Do you love me, like you did yesterday?" Kaoru mumbled.

"Huh?" The three asked, Kyouya and Mori were holding Tamaki up, Hunny was still holding Kaoru's hand. The three stared at him as Takami regained conciousness.

But all Kaoru saw and heard was what was happening with his beloved twin. His loving brother. HIS Hikaru.

"I warned you," Kyouya sighed. "that the first date might have developed feelings of love."

_I know that, but..._ Kaoru thought. _I just wanted to hold on, a little longer._

"You said you'd come back," Kaoru whined under his breath. "You promised this morning."

_What do I really mean to him?_

"Hey, Haruhi," Hikaru bugged after a while. They were still in the park. "I know the answer to your question."

"Oh, so are you gay with Kaoru?" Haruhi remembered and blushed a bit at how it sounded.

_When she phrases it that way, _Hikaru blushed.

"Well, I just see Kaoru as a brother, but I think I'm bisexual."

"Oh."

_As a brother? Hardly. _Hikaru scowled himself. _But that's OUR secret._

"Just as a brother?" Haruhi asked, obviously not convinced. It's like she read his mind!

"Uh..." Hikaru mumbled, blushing.

_Answer! Or she'll figure it out!_

"I won't tell," Haruhi giggled as she got up walked away. Quickly, she stopped and turned on her heel so she faced Hikaru again. "On one condition."

"What condition?" Hikaru whispered.

_You just confirmed her question! You IDIOT! _Hikaru yelled at himself.

"You tell me what's going on!" Haruhi smiled.

"Nothing's going on!" Hikaru finally defended. "W-we're just brothers!"

"Do you love him?" Haruhi questioned childishly.

"N-no."

The word stung his tongue and his throat choked.

"Oh."

"I mean, I love him as a brother."

"Nothing more?"

Something about Haruhi's attitude bugged and hurt Hikaru. Almost like she was TRYING to make him feel guilty.

"N-not..."

"Why are you hesitating?"

Hikaru growled and cursed under his breath. Where had hi and his brothers years of acting and defending gone to? This intruder had stolen it.

She couldn't find out, not after how hard Kaoru and him had tried to keep their secret for years. She just couldn't. Haruhi couldn't know what happened between Hikaru and Kaoru.

"It's none of your business!" Hikaru defended.

"As your friend I do deserve to know. It is my business," Haruhi replied almost arrogantly.

Hikaru recoiled as he thought it over. Haruhi did have a point, she did deserve to know their secret. But she couldn't know. Hikaru didn't have a reason, Haruhi just couldn't know.

"Haruhi, you're hurting me," Hikaru admitted quickly.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Haruhi responded quietly, blushing. "I didn't realize."

"Well, it's a touchy subject!" Hikaru shouted.

Haruhi laughed. "okay. I get it, Hikaru. I don't see why you're so touchy about it though. You act like the way you do at school at home, too. Right?"

Hikaru blushed.

_I don't kiss him at school. I don't hold him like that at school._

_I don't love him the same way at school._

"Let me at 'em!" Kaoru and Tamaki grunted at the same time.

Kyouya snarled as he held the two back.

"Mitsukuni? Takashi? Help, please."

"Aye-aye, Kyo-chan!" Hunny chimed.

Hunny and Mori held Kaoru back while Kyouya dealt with Tamaki. Tamaki's face was filled with jealousy, but for some reason Kaoru's wasn't. Kaoru's was filled with rage and embarassment. They were two new emotions to him.

"He's mine..." Kaoru huffed, fighting back tears.

Tamaki relaxed and stared at him. His face turned remorseful and looked at Hikaru and Haruhi again.

_Just a brother..._ the thought rang throughout Kaoru's mind. _Nothing more, not really._

"Kaoru..." Tamaki winced as he whispered the boys name.

Kaoru trembled as he stared at Haruhi. What was this feeling? Hate? Shame? Love? Guilt? Jealousy? All five?

"Kao-kun?" Hunny whispered.

Kaoru tried to ignore them. He tried to look at his brother. He tried to let go of his brother. He tried to forget. He tried to pretend he wasn't in love. No matter how hard he tried, it wouldn't work.

"Get him out of here," Kyouya finally ordered, realizing Kaoru's situation. "before he blows our cover."

Tamaki got out of Kyouya's grasp and put his hand on Kaoru's shoulder and smiled lightly. Kaoru tried to look at him. But he couldn't. He couldn't take his eyes off of... this-this... girl.

_Why?_

Kaoru trembled even more. Hunny and Mori let go and Tamaki carried him off. Kyouya, Hunny, and Mori only stared as they left. Then they got back to observing the other two. The two who'd just broken delicate hearts. The two who were probably breaking themselves.

"Hikaru!" Kaoru finally broke down in a high-pitch whine.

Tamaki sat him down on a bench and rested next to him, his hand on Kaoru's knee. He stroked his thumb on Kaoru's knee.

"You'll be okay," Tamaki attempted to comfort.

"That's what I'm trying to tell myself! I'm trying to let go, trying not to love, trying not to hate-"

"You're trying too hard!" Tamaki scowled scornfully.

Kaoru grabbed Tamaki's shirt by the collar and slammed him down on the bench.

"It won't be okay!" Kaoru scowled.

Tamaki stared inot Kaoru's pained and crying eyes.

"How'd you hurt your hand?"

"Shut-up!" Kaoru snarled as he put head onto Tamaki's chest, his grip loosening. He sobbed and whined again, "shut-up..."

Tamaki sighed and stared at the dark sky. A raindrop landed on his cheek.

"It's crying for you."

"What?"

"The sky, it's crying for you."

Kaoru slowly picked himself up and stared at the sky as well. As the rain began pouring on his face, Kaoru broke into long mournful sobs.

"I-I have to... let go," Kaoru choked through his red, wet face..

"No," Tamaki objected as he sat up, he hugged Kaoru lightly. "You're both so childish."

"Shut-up," Kaoru tried to laugh.

Tamaki smiled as he gazed into the sullen, alone, dying eyes of a soaked young man. In the cold loneliness Tamaki thought he looked like a child.

"Don't go," Tamaki whispered under his breath. Kaoru choked, but didn't say anything.

_What does that mean?_

"D-did you hear that?" Haruhi shrieked, moving closer to Hikaru.

"Thunder?" Hikaru questioned.

"Y-yeah. Did you hear it?"

"No, but I don't fear it, either."

Hikaru grabbed her hand and heard voices.

"What?" Hikaru scowled, looking at the trees.

"You idiots!" Kyouya's voice scolded.

"Does that mean we can see Hika-chan now?" Hunny's voice seemed to rejoice.

_No! Tell me Kaoru's not with them!_

Hikaru ran and glared at Mori, Kyouya and Hunny. No Tamaki or Kaoru in sight. Hikaru sighed in relief and let go of Haruhi's hand.

Rain began pouring on their heads.

"Let's go," Hikaru chuckled.

For some reason, he didn't hold Haruhi's hand. For the same reason he walked through the other end of the park. As they walked on, something Hikaru's eye and stopped his heart.

"K-Kaoru?" Hikaru winced as he witnessed Kaoru and Tamaki embracing on a bench. Hikaru didn't notice his twin sobbing.

"Hikaru?" Kaoru blushed, turning his head to look his twin in the eye.

_How could you?_

_It's not-_

_HOW COULD YOU?_

Hikaru turned and darted off.

"WOULD YOU LISTEN TO ME?" Kaoru yelled. He jumped up and stood, staring.

Kaoru's hand began bleeding again as it ripped on the bench as he scrambled up. Everyone stared at it.

"What-" They all started.

Kaoru's hand tensed and he clenched his teeth. His muscles strained as he clenched his fist even harder than his teeth.

"Kaoru," Tamaki whined quietly. "your hand."

"Like it matters," Kaoru mumbled again, too quiet again.

"Kaoru!" Haruhi yelled as she stomped over. "Stop acting like a child!"

"Shut-up!" Kaoru snarled glaring into her eyes.

Haruhi winced back, hurt.

"What happened?" Haruhi asked Tamaki.

Tamaki shrugged. "He finally snapped, I guess."

Haruhi looked back at Kaoru and slapped him hard. Everyone, even Kaoru, held their breath for a moment. Then Kaoru turned and glared into Haruhi's eyes. Haruhi wanted to cry suddenly as she witnessed the pain in his eyes.

"You think you know me! I'm sick of it!" Kaoru snapped at Haruhi, looking like he was gonna sock her. "I'm tired of you thinking you know Hikaru! He's MY brother!"

Haruhi pulled him close and stroked his back, trying not to cry. Kaoru didn't try hard enough again. He began sobbing, making Haruhi want to as well. The trembling just seemed to get to her.

"Only I know Hikaru." Kaoru sobbed. "He's my brother."

_My darling brother._

"Do you... love him?"

"Of course."

"As more than a brother?"

Kaoru didn't even have to think. "Definetly yes."

Kaoru calmed again. There was something about Haruhi that always calmed him. He laughed and buried his face into Haruhi's shoulder.

"Don't let them see me," Kaoru replied absent-mindedly.

"Who?" They all wondered.

"Just don't."

_You can see me, just don't tell them. They'd hate me. They'd kill me. Don't let them see me._

The remaining four Club members attempted to bring the broken twins together.

"He's heavy," Haruhi laughed.

"Why are you treating me like a criminal?" Kaoru finally whined as he dropped his shirt to the floor.

Hikaru stared out the window at the lightning and deafening, pounding rain. He was attempting to drown out his brother.

Kaoru sat next to him, he was stripped down to his boxers. Kaoru stared into his eyes. Anger grasped his thoughts.

"Dammit, Hikaru!" Kaoru shouted, pushing Hikaru onto the ground.

Hikaru was forced to look at Kaoru now. He was a little startled at how rash Kaoru'd been that day.

"Why..."

"Why what?"

"Why were you with the Lord like that?"

"It wasn't like THAT!" Kaoru scolded. "But someone didn't want to listen to me!"

"Like you care!" Hikaru growled.

"I do care! More than you!"

Kaoru sighed and layed his head on Hikaru's chest, letting their bodies collide, melt together. Kaoru matched his breathing rate to his twins.

"We're disconnected."

Hikaru wrapped his arms tightly around Kaoru.

"No," Hikaru sobbed. "No we're not!"

"I'm just a brother after all."

Hikaru sobbed and cried as he imagined his day so far. Kaoru had seen all of it.

"I love you."

Kaoru attempted to get up and smacked Hikaru across the face.

"Don't you EVER say that to me!" Kaoru growled.

Hikaru pulled him down and kissed him deeply, feeling him up and down. Kaoru teared up and gave in. Tears streamed down Kaoru's and Hikaru's faces. They struggled to breath; they didn't want to stop kissing.

Kaoru sucked Hikaru's lower lip while Hikaru licked Kaoru's upper lip. They switched and licked eachothers tongues.

"They can never know," both agreed quietly.

"But they do, the Club does," Kaoru pointed out.

"As long as no one else knows, they'd kill us," Hikaru agreed with the words spoken in Kaoru's eyes.

"Do you hate me?" Kaoru asked randomly.

"Maybe in public," they both laughed.

"What should we do?" One maid whispered to the other nervously.

"Tell the Mister and Mistress, duh," The other scolded as they began walking to the living room.

"Well?" A feminine voice asked as the two maids walked in to the living room.

"We have news."

"Do tell, please."

"Well ma'am... the young masters..."

"What about my sons?"

One sighed and shook her head slowly. "We caught them kissing again."

"This is becoming serious!" A male voice argued.

"I know, I know," The female sighed. "but Kaoru's been... suicidal? Yes, suicidal lately."

"My boys won't be homosexual," Mr. Hitachiin snarled.

"I don't want them to be either, but they seem to love eachother," Mrs. Hitachiin replied. "Anything else?"

The maids cleared their thraots, "the two hold eachother closer than normal. Their hands... wander." The two blushed.

"Wander?"

"Well, see, sometimes..." They sighed, visually flustered. "Their hands are in... _inappropriate_ places for brothers, I guess."

"I don't want them together." Their father announced.

"Oh, come now," Their mother protested.

"You come now! Next it will be sex!"

They were all quiet and finally agreed.

"Maybe you're right."

Kaoru held Hikaru's burning, naked body against his almost naked body. Hikaru winced as Kaoru held him close, but he didn't object.

"Are we virgins?" Kaoru tried to remember.

"Shh, no. Don't you remember that one night?" Hikaru whispered, Kaoru trembling at Hikaru's breath on his neck. "But we can't tell _them_."

Hikaru blushed deeply as he felt the full effects of Kaoru's trembling.

_Damn hormones!_ They both cursed to themselves.

"You know Sex Education, Kaoru?"

"Yes."

"Remember hormones?"

"Hell yes."

"I'm... having..."

"Me too."

They both blushed and held eachother closer. Hikaru grinned devilishly.

"I can solve both our problems," He laughed.

"Not while mom and dad are home!" Kaoru whined as Hikaru pulled off his boxers.

"Oh, shut-up," Hikaru snarled.

Hikaru kissed Kaoru deeply and pressed their waists together tightly. He grinned.

"How're your hormones, now?" Hikaru giggled.

"Hhiikkaaarrruuuu!" Kaoru moaned pulling his brother nearer, his face burning red.

Hikaru sighed.

"Nevermind, mom and dad might hear you groan."

"Or you be loud and obnoxious and perverted!"

"Because it gets your hormones going!"

"You do it at school too!"

"You think mine aren't raging there too?"

Kaoru gazed into his eyes. "How badly?"

"I just wanna get you right then and there."

"Forget mom and dad," Kaoru giggled moving his hands farther down Hikaru's spine, making Hikaru groan. "Please me."

"Screw you!" Hikaru whined.

"If you must," Kaoru laughed.

"You'll regret that!"

Kaoru kissed Hikaru and ran his hand from Hikaru's leg up to his hair. Hikaru trembled and made Kaoru whine.

"We shouldn't," Kaoru admitted.

Hikaru laid his head on Kaoru's stomach and snarled. "You got my hormones raging too much. You can't tell me, '_no_' now, young man!"

Kaoru grinned and moved his legs, forcing Hikaru to cringe and blush. They heard shuffling in the hall and they pulled up close under the covres.

"Nevermind," they both sighed.

They fell asleep then, but not without stroking the others body. This was only the second time Hikaru ever felt Kaoru naked after they hit teenagerdom.

_I REALLY wanted to... _they both thought.

"Tomorrow?" Kaoru whispered, his hormones trying to control him. He was already moving his hand up and down Hikaru all over.

"Hell yes, maybe even later tonight," Hikaru grinned.

Kaoru closed his eyes.

_Or maybe never again. Dammit, I'm trying to let go. _Kaoru thought.

They didn't know that the adults knew more than they were given credit for.


	4. Something's Wrong With Kaoru

**Sorry it's taken me so long, been avoiding my computer... but this chapter has been ready for a long time but it's been really long and I've thought it'd take too long to type and then my 'friend' borrowed my notebook and read it. She said she liked it a lot so I'm happy about that. Sadly I've been distracted by another story I'm writing, I'll try to focus on this one for you guys. Got any ideas on where the relationship should go? Write it in the Review, it would be REALLY appreciated, and thank all you reviewers.**

The twins weren't talking to eachother that day. They had a _talk_ that morning.

"It's all your fault," Hikaru finally accused.

"Oh really?" Kaoru snapped back.

"Yes! It is!"

Tamaki looked over and sighed.

"What's wrong?" He asked as he sat down on the couch across the table from them.

"Kaoru got me into trouble!" Hikaru snarled.

"Why do you hate me?" Kaoru whispered.

Hikaru gazed into his eyes and Kaoru remembered something.

_"Do you hate me?"_

_"Only in public."_

"Because you're obnoxious, and now mom and dad think I'm gay!" Hikaru snapped when he figured out that Kaoru remembered.

"Well you cuddled too close!" Kaoru acted, his head hurt at the yelling.

"Because you were whining!"

"Because YOU were too close!"

"But you liked it!"

Kaoru flinched, without realizing it, Hikaru had hit him right on the nose. Did Hikaru realize Kaoru liked it?

"I did not!" Kaoru blushed.

"You know you did!" Hikaru snapped back, more aggressive than before.

"Like you'd care if I liked it! You're self centered and care nothing about my feelings!"

Hikaru growled and pulled Kaoru close, Kaoru blushed at Hikaru's rash actions. Hikaru was holding him like he would at home, kissing his forehead, lips, cheeks, and neck. They were in public in the Host Club. Everyone was staring.

"We're at school," Kaoru finally spoke up.

As if a light bulb flashed on, Hikaru pushed Kaoru and sat down. He was extremely flustered. Kaoru picked himself up off the floor and sat next to his twin. They looked like mirror images.

_Hikaru, what was with that?_

_It was nothing._

_What was that?_

_Nothing!_

Kaoru grunted as a sign of defeat, the room was still silent from when the fight started.

"You two know how to kill and make a mood for sure," Tamaki teased, laughing.

"Kao-kun?" Hunny whined, pulling at Kaoru's shirt sleeve.

"Yes Hunny-sempai?" Kaoru responded quietly.

"Wanna come with Takashi and me and get some ice cream?"

"Sure."

Hikaru felt torn as his brother left him. He stared after him and thought about earlier.

_"You two aren't allowed to be together anymore," _all the staff and adults in the Hitachiin household announced.

_"What?" _Hikaru had objected.

Kaoru sat quiet the whole time nodding his head. Hikaru couldn't tell what he was thinking.

_"Now Kaoru, what was this knife incident about?" _Their mother had asked Kaoru concerned.

Kaoru stood up and started walking out. _"Since when have any of you people ever cared?"_

The words Kaoru had said still stung Hikaru's mind as he watched Kaoru leave once again.

"I can explain," Tamaki replied in a hushed voice.

"Explain what?"

"Yesterday."

"Please do, Kaoru didn't explain too well," Hikaru responded.

"Kaoru was breaking down and he needed comfort," Tamaki paused. "He snapped as well."

"Snapped?"

"He was getting very agressive. I don't think he knows how to display his emotions. That's why he doesn't seem as rash as you."

Hikaru put his head in his hands. He fell in love with Haruhi and was losing his best friend, his life companion, his little twin brother. He couldn't imagine a life without Kaoru. Hearing Kaoru had acted this and that way upsetted Hikaru because he wasn't there. Kaoru was right.

They were disconnected.

"No..." Hikaru whispered to himself.

_Why hasn't Kaoru ever told me these things? Doesn't he trust me? Doesn't he love me? Doesn't he care about me?_

Haruhi walked over and sat next to Tamaki and whispered something in his ear. Tamaki tensed, and Hikaru held his breath.

"You're sure?" Tamaki asked Haruhi.

She nodded and Hikaru felt unsure. "W-what's wrong?"

"Kaoru's gone," Tamaki answered. He stood up and walked with Haruhi out of the Music Room.

"No..." Hikaru whined as everyone left. "...this isn't happening."

"It must be a dream."

Hikaru scrambled and struggled to see the face of the person who'd snuck up from behind. Their hands rested on Hikaru's shoulders.

"I've often wished that. But it's not true."

"Kaoru?" Hikaru guessed.

"I've often wished this was a dream and I'd wake up in a different life, a different world."

"Kaoru? I recognize your voice. This isn't funny, and what are you talking about?"

The grip on his shoulders tightened to the point of hurting. "In that world you didn't know me. I didn't know you. Loving you was all in the dream."

"What are you saying?"

The hands recoiled and sure enough, when Hikaru turned around he saw Kaoru standing there.

"What are you trying to tell me?" Hikaru asked softer.

"Nevermind," Kaoru looked away.

"Don't you dare think I'm an idiot for not understanding that! No one could!"

"But you do understand. That's why you're yelling."

Hikaru recoiled and thought. Kaoru was right.

_Does that mean... he wishes he'd never me? _Hikaru finally admitted to himself.

"Do you hate me?" Hikaru whispered.

Kaoru smiled and hid his eyes as a tear fell down his hidden face. "Not even in public."

"Kaoru..."

Kaoru scowled and walked away.

"Maybe they should never find me."

"They should never find us."

"SHUT-UP!" Kaoru snapped, still not looking at Hikaru. "I don't want to be with you!"

"You don't?"

Kaoru held his breath as he tried to lie. His mouth wouldn't open.

"Do you know what the knife was about?"

Hikaru paused. "No, not really."

Kaoru looked at him and Hikaru caught a glimpse of Kaoru's crying, alone, pale face. He never realized how alone Kaoru felt.

"I love you." Kaoru choked. "That's why."

"I don't get it."

Kaoru shook his head and stalked off and sat in a corner. The other fice Club members sat around Hikaru and then all six stared at their seventh member, Kaoru. ((They were eavesdropping FYI))

"Kaoru? Are you okay?" Haruhi finally asked.

_Of course he's not._

"Yeah," Kaoru replied quietly.

"You wanna go home? I'm sure Kyouya-senpai will allow you to."

"I don't want to go home, never again."

_I don't want to leave. Never again. I never want to leave you Kaoru._

"I'll stay with you!" Hikaru spoke up.

Haruhi and Kaoru tensed and Haruhi faked a smile. She gazed at Hikaru solemnly. Hikaru caught it. Everyone did.

"No you won't," Kaoru scowled. "that's what you always promised. Look at us now."

"No, Kaoru, I mean it!"

But everyone knew he didn't.

"I hate you."

The words stung Hikaru's whole being. But they cut and hurt Kaoru worse.

"What?"

"I... h-ha-"

"No!" Haruhi shouted, standing up and stormed over to Kaoru. She slapped him on the head. "We all know you don't! So what is this all about anyway?"

"We're getting seperate rooms, seperate beds, seperate desks, seperate classes..." Kaoru paused. "...seperate lives, seperate hearts."

"Says who?" Haruhi asked quieter.

"Mom and dad and the maids. They want their kids to get married. They want grandchildren."

"Don't you want to get married?"

"YOU DON'T GET IT!" Kaoru snapped again as he punched the wall. "I DO want to get married! But not to some-some... petty princess!"

Haruhi held her breath as Kaoru stood and grabbed her shoulder firmly. She'd never felt this around Kaoru before. She never felt fear around sweet and gentle Kaoru.

"I don't want to marry someone like you, either."

"Then who do you want to marry?"

"Shut-up!" Kaoru whined, still hiding his face. "Just shut-up!"

Haruhi hugged him and stroked his back. He hugged her back.

"Do you hate me, Kaoru?"

"You? Not ever. I could never hate any of you." Kaoru replied.

"Good," Haruhi giggled in relief and hugged him tighter. "any better yet?"

"No," Kaoru answered truthfully.

"I'll take care of it," Tamaki interrupted as he got up and walked over. He took Kaoru's hand after the two broke the hug. "come with me."

The two sat in a corner and the other five eavesdropped.

"What's wrong?"

"My Hikaru..." Kaoru whined in his high pitch tone as he fell and leaned on Tamaki. Tamaki wrapped his arm around him. "...my Hika-chan. They're taking him away from me!"

"Wasn't that your plan from the start? To seperate from Hikaru?"

"Yes, but..."

"What?"

"I never _wanted_ to!"

Tamaki laughed, "You idiot."

"Shut-up."

"No, if you can't silence someone with that phrase it means they love you."

"You love me?"

"We all do," Tamaki admitted. "we're a family. Remember?"

"Family sucks."

Tamaki sighed and they sat in silence for a moment.

"So the knife incident was because you loved Hikaru?" Tamaki inquired.

"I _love_ Hikaru, thank you, not _loved_."

"Sorry... because you _love_ Hikaru?"

"Nah, Hika-chan startled me and the knife stabbed me."

"Why were you alone with a knife?"

Hikaru hushed and squirmed a bit.

"I dunno."

Tamaki sighed.

"You calm, yet?"

"...yeah."

Kaoru looked up at Tamaki and smiled. "You selfish brat."

"You arrogant idiotic twin," Tamaki laughed back.

Tamaki stared into the face again. The others only caught a glimpse. The eyes hurt and were more deathlike than yesterday, and the skin was tearwashed and too pale.

"Get some sleep before you let them see you," Tamaki suggested, staring into the dying eyes.

"Yes M'Lord," Kaoru chuckled.

"You can't take him away from me!" Kaoru overheard Hikaru.

He walked over to the living room entrance and stared in at the three. Mom and Dad sat on the couch while Hikaru sat in an arm-chair.

"Why not?" The mom asked.

"He's dying..." Hikaru whispered.

"Nonsense!" Their dad scowled. "Kaoru's a big boy now."

"He's my brother!" Hikaru sobbed.

"Not your lover!" Their parents finished.

"He's my Kaoru! He'll die!"

"You'll still se eachother!" Mom noted.

"He's already dying!"

Hikaru covered his face and he trembled as he cried.

"I'm killing him."

The parents looked at eachother.

"Maybe Kaoru should be in a psychward?"

"My baby brother," Hikaru whined. "he's dying!"

Kaoru ran in and hugged his brother. They held eachother so tightly it felt like they were bleeding.

Their parents watched solemnly. Tamaki and Haruhi stood behind the couch, they'd come when the twins parents asked them to.

"You're not really doing this, right?" Tamaki asked concerned.

"They're too close. We're afraid of what this could turn into. I don't want my children to love no one other than eachother."

"But Hikaru and I are going out," Haruhi added.

"Really?"

"Yes."

Kaoru felt himself beginning to hate that voice. Maybe he was starting to hate Haruhi.

"I don't see you as a brother, they're right," Kaoru whispered into Hikaru's ear.

Hikaru trembled at Kaoru's warm breath, maybe he didn't see Kaoru as just a brother either. Or maybe Kaoru was just a way to relieve hormones. But Kaoru was the only one who got Hikaru's hormones raging.

Right now, Hikaru's hormones were raging worse than Kaoru's anger. Kaoru was feeling the same thing.

"Damn hormones..." they both whispered.

They held eachother closer and tighter, trying to hide how close their waists were. Hikaru kissed Kaoru's neck out of their parents view. They didn't want to get in more trouble, but they needed this.

Kaoru needed Hikaru.

Hikaru needed Kaoru.

Tamaki caught on to what was happening.

"Maybe we should talk about this outside!" He suggested.

The parents agreed and walked outide with Tamaki. Haruhi stayed and watched the twins.

"Oh, thank God for the Lord," Hikaru replied in great relief. "I don't know how much longer I could stay still!"

Kaoru climbed up and sat in Hikaru's lap. His legs hung over the armrest and he layed his head on Hikaru's chest. They both blushed and Hikaru wrapped his arms around Kaoru's waist possessively.

Kaoru licked Hikaru's neck and Hikaru trembled making Kaoru go red.

"How're your hormones now?" Kaoru mocked.

Hikaru interlocked lips with him and they kissed long and hard. Their tongues hurt too, but they still wanted more.

Haruhi closed her eyes as she realized she had feelings for Hikaru too. But she already loved Tamaki. It was like a love square instead of triangle. ((Keep in mind the question, "or does she have feelings for insert name here ?"))

"I just wanna do you right here and now," Hikaru laughed, kissing Kaoru's upper lip again.

"Get me to our room and I won't object," Kaoru replied.

Haruhi watched as Hikaru carried Kaoru up the stairs.

"There would always be problems with either guy," Haruhi realized. "Tamaki and his family and Hikaru and his twin."

Hikaru and Kaoru laid down on their bed together, cuddling up. They sighed in unision and tried to get their reactions to die down.

"You might have just ruined it with Haruhi," Kaoru pointed out, staring sideways at his twin. Hikaru was focusing on the ceiling, but he must have been paying more attention to his hand as it stroked Kaoru's arm.

"I don't care," Hikaru finally replied as he rolled over to look at his twin. "you're dying."

Kaoru turned over to avoid his twins eyes. Through their seperation Hikaru could finally see Kaoru's pain.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Kaoru closed his eyes and tried to sleep. _Leave me alone._

Hikaru wrapped his arms around Kaoru and pulled him close.

"You can tell me things," Hikaru cooed.

"Not anymore, this is the last time we'll share a room, the last night, Hikaru!" Kaoru sobbed, his body trembling.

Hikaru let go and sat up.

"Maybe it's a good thing," Hikaru thought out loud quietly. "if it would've happened just a week ago I wouldn't have gotten attached. Maybe we should just get girlfriends and forget about it.

Kaoru's throat choked and he felt like he needed to writhe at the pain in his stomach. He squeaked, "yeah."

_"Don't go," _Kaoru remembered Tamaki saying. He knew what that meant now.

_I can't keep that promise, _Kaoru finally admitted to himself as Hikaru left the room. _I'm sorry, Tamaki._

"Where's Kaoru?" Everyone asked worridly as Hikaru walked in.

"Off my back," Hikaru responded a bit snottily.

Tamaki stared at Mr. and Mrs. Hitachiin and frowned.

"Poor Kaoru," he muttered.

He looked around and walked towards the stairs. He looked back at everyone and said aloud, "I'm gonna go see what Kaoru's up to."

The parents nodded in approval and then went on talking to people. Tamaki ascended the stairs and carefully walked into the twins' bedroom.

"I can't," Kaoru kept whispering over and over again. He was sprawled out on his bed. Finally he said something new as Tamaki was going to sit down on the bed. "I just can't anymore, I'm so sorry."

"You can," Tamaki replied, putting his hand on Kaoru's and squeezing it tight. "depending on what it is, of course."

Kaoru refused to look at Tamaki.

"I can't."

"Can't what?"

Kaoru sat up, embraced Tamaki, and started sobbing deeply. Tamaki just hugged him back.

"There, there."

"I can't!" Kaoru sobbed deeper.

_I hate this, I'm getting close to people._

"I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay," Tamaki sighed.

"No! It's not okay!"

"Are you okay?"

"..."

"Kaoru?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Then you'll promise me you'll stay?" Tamaki nagged a bit.

Kaoru flinched.

"I can't. I won't."

Tamaki pushed him away, held his shoulders, and gazed into Kaoru's eyes. It looked like he was searching for something. He sighed and chuckled.

"We're the Host Club. We help relationships, remember?" Tamaki laughed.

"It's done!" Kaoru snapped pushing Tamaki down on the bed. "You can't tell."

"I don't want you to go, I can't just standby and watch you die."

"You've done a good job at it so far!"

"Kaoru-"

"Tamaki."

"When did I change from 'Lord'?"

Kaoru gazed into Tamaki's eyes. _One big family._

"Dad."

Tamaki took a quick breath and seemed to prod Kaoru's head for answers. Kaoru wasn't giving in, he was concerned himself.

"Make sure my son doesn't sexually abuse your sister," Tamaki tried to lighten the mood.

"She'll have worse to worry about if that happens," Kaoru whispered codly, his words bitter and sharp.

"Kaoru? Lord? What are-"

The two turned their heads to look at Hikaru in the doorway. Poor kid, must've been a disturbing scene for him. His little twin brother pinning down his Club leader who was a year older than his brother.

Kaoru glared at his brother with a gaze Hikaru used to understand. Now he couldn't. But Kaoru read Hikaru easily and perfectly. Hikaru was scared, shaken, rattled, and worst of all...

Jealous.

Something new hit Kaoru's senses, it was a new emotion. It was sick pleasure. Something about Hikaru's horrorful awe and jealousy made Kaoru smile.

"What is it, big brother?" Kaoru seemed to mock.

_What's wrong with me? _Kaoru wanted to scream. _This isn't me. I don't want to see Hikaru hurt. I don't like Dad-Tamaki!-that way!_

"How-how could you?" Hikaru finally shouted. "I came to apologize for earlier!"

"I didn't do anything wrong," Kaoru whispered returning his gaze to Tamaki. Something made him feel sick. Suddenly he wanted nothing but see these people hurt.

_This isn't me._

Hikaru scowled and stormed down the stairs to see Haruhi.

Kaoru glared into Tamaki's eyes, the blood rushing through veins and the sick feelings spread with it.

"Family sucks."

"No it doesn't-"

"They all like Hikaru better. They couldn't care less about me."

"That's not true!"

"Oh? Is it?"

Tamaki cringed and flinched at Kaoru's new attitude.

"Hikaru! Haruhi!" Tamaki shouted as pure horror flashed in his eyes for a moment. Kaoru grinned.

_This isn't me._

"Kaoru?" Haruhi asked walking into the room.

"Get lost, princess."

_These aren't my words._

"Kaoru!" Hikaru snapped pulling Kaoru off of Tamaki. "What's with that? Don't talk like that to them!"

"You can."

"No I can't!"

"You did."

"I got slapped though!"

"What's your point?" Kaoru snarled, glaring hatefully into Hikaru's eyes. Everyone saw the hate.

No one saw the screaming of help.

"I can't believe this is what my brother's become under jealousy," Hikaru scoffed. "I'm glad we're getting seperated!"

"So am I!"

"I wish-"

"Wishing doesn't get you anything!"

"Go back to normal!" Hikaru yelled, pinning Kaoru to the bed.

"How do you know that this isn't me?" Kaoru growled.

"You wanna know what?"

"What?" Kaoru scowled.

Hikaru slapped him hard across the face and Tamaki and Haruhi ran out. "I hate you. I hope I never see your face again."

Hikaru left with the others. Kaoru walked to the window and saw everyone leaving: the maids, parents, Hikaru, and the Club. They all left Kaoru behind.

Kaoru's legs finally collapsed and he regained himself once he hit the floor. He sobbed deeply and his face and head hurt from Hikaru's slap. But his heart the worst. Now his brother hated him, he didn't even want to see Kaoru's face.

"I can't!" Kaoru screamed slamming his head against the wall. "I can't take it no longer!"

_It hurts... _Kaoru curled into a ball.

"It hurts..."


	5. Nightmares

**Yup, here's 5 already!**

"Let me go..."

"Kaoru? Wake-up already."

"Let me go!"

"Kaoru! This is my room!" Hikaru snapped, trying to shake Kaoru awake. He recoiled at how hot Kaoru's head was and how ice cold his arms were. "My room..."

"Let me go!" Kaoru screamed, writhing in his sleep.

"Shh," Hikaru laid next to him and embraced Kaoru. "It's alright. Big brother's here."

_A voice dug at his head._

_"Where am I?" Kaoru asked, looking around him._

_"Good question," Someone laughed._

_Kaoru turned and stared at someone just like him._

_"Hikaru?"_

_"Good guess, but I'm closer than that."_

_"M-me?"_

_Kaoru's breath left him and everything burned like it was extremely hot or cold. Hands wrapped around him and squeezed him. He heard his bones crack._

_"Let me go..."_

_"Kaoru?" Someone asked._

_Bloody bodies appeared around._

_"Let me go!" Kaoru shouted._

_The hands came tighter and he watched his own blood ooze on the ground. Faces became recognizable and his friends and family lay mutilated before him. He writhed and cried._

_"LET ME GO!"_

_The hell continued, the pain sky-rocketing, then the hands around him changed into a soft embrace._

_"Kaoru..." The voice cooed. "...I'm sorry."_

_"Hikaru!" Kaoru cried. "I'm scared!"_

_"I'm here now."_

Kaoru cuddled into Hikaru crying and tense.

"Kaoru, this is all my fault. You always get nightmares after fights. I'm sorry."

"Hikaru!" Kaoru suddenly cried cuddling closer and sobbing harder. "I'm scared!"

"I'm here now."

Kaoru's eyes shot open and he stared through his tears at Hikaru. The pain still grasped him.

"It hurts," Kaoru blushed.

"What does?"

"Everything! It was hurting me! It killed you guys!"

"It was a dream!" Hikaru chuckled.

Kaoru looked into Hikaru's eyes, feeling sick again.

"It wasn't. That thing isn't a dream."

Hikaru stared at Kaoru.

_What does he mean?_

Kaoru's face twisted and he frowned and cried a bit more.

"It was me. Or it looked like me and resided in me," Kaoru continued.

"Do you think you belong in a psychward?" Hikaru questioned carefully.

Kaoru pushed Hikaru away.

"You bastard!" Kaoru yelled.

_What did I do?_

"What?" Hikaru snapped back.

Kaoru climbed on him and wrapped his hands around Hikaru's neck and smiled sadistically at Hikaru's pulse under his fingertips.

_"It was hurting me! It killed you guys! ...It wasn't. That thing isn't a dream. It was me," _Kaoru had said.

"I love you," Hikaru countered.

"No you don't."

_That's what it's about! Kaoru's subconciously sick of pain and wants to cause others pain and is killing himself in the process!_

Hikaru finally read Kaoru's eyes. "Save me."

Kaoru's fingers tightened until Hikaru screamed.

"Stop! Stop! Help me!" Hikaru panicked. **((I just realized, this seems very unlikely... xD ))**

Kaoru stared at Hikaru's horrified face and laughed. Then he let go, got up, and walked out to go to his room.

_W-what?_

Hikaru struggled to breath. Kaoru was gone.

The grip wasn't.

The twins looked horrible. People had been gossiping about them all day.

"They were fighting all night.

"They were _busy_."

"Weren't allowed to sleep I guess."

"Probably had to deal with Haruhi-kun."

"Who cares?"

Hunny ate his cakes with Mori and Haruhi happily. Kyouya was estimating the club funds. Tamaki was obsessing on the outside but was really worrying.

The door slammed and everyone's heads snapped to see the groggy twins.

"You're late and horrible looking!" Tamaki complained.

"Well, Kaoru scared me!" Hikaru complained back.

"Oh? How so?"

"He tried to strangle me!"

"Did not!" Kaoru scowled.

Kaoru sat down and looked away from everyone still feeling sick. He had the dream two more times the other night, each more sick and twisted. He had a long scar on his arms from him cutting his arms to stay awake. He was afraid of this thing.

_Maybe I should think about the psychward._

"You tried to kill Hikaru?" Tamaki asked. Everyone crowded around as well.

"No."

"Really now?"

"Yes!"

"Oh really?"

"YES! IT WAS **IT**!" Kaoru snapped. He stood up and walked to a chair. Kaoru sat down and almost immediatly fell asleep.

"He had a bad nightmare, then he got all sobby then violent on me," Hikaru added.

"A nightmare, eh?"

_The hands choked him and he writhed as more bodies came and the scars on his arms bled onto the floor._

_"Noo!" He screamed._

_"Kaoru!" Voices called._

_The grip increased on the throat and Kaoru screamed._

_Kaoru caught a glimpse of the face. It indeed looked like his own only with a cut on the cheek._

_The person smiled and everything went red and pain shot all through Kaoru's body._

_"Kaoru!"_

"Noo!" Kaoru screamed.

"Kaoru!" Everyone stared at him and walked over. He writhed and squirmed, tears falling down his face.

Suddenly he screamed greatly. and Tamaki and Hikaru shook him.

"Kaoru!"

Kaoru's eyes shot open like they did the previos night and his skin was burning and his sleeves were stained with blood.

Hikaru rolled up the sleeves.

"Where'd these cuts come from?"

"I-"

Kaoru couldn't talk, everything hurt, and everything was still shades of red.

"I think you're right."

"Huh?"

"I need the psychoward's help."

"Where did the cuts-"

"I did it to stay awake. But I fell asleep again," Kaoru replied, blushing.

"You idiot!" Hikaru hugged him tight.

Kaoru felt sick and Hikaru the pain clutch his neck again.

_It's like his touch hurts me. _They both thought.

"Can we talk in private?" Hikaru broke the silence.

Everyone nodded and left the twins alone in the room. Hikaru kissed Kaoru passionately.

"Hell, I missed you!" Hikaru exclaimed.

"It thought you hated me?"

"Only in public, remember?"

"Oh. Yeah."

Kaoru felt stupid and the sickness spread. He gazed in his brother's eyes. Kaoru should've been able to read that!

"You scared the hell out've me!"

Kaoru blushed and hugged Hikaru.

"Tell me the dreams."

"I was alone and I felt this sick feeling. I saw someone who looked just like me. Then he dissapeared and something squeezed and choked me. Then bodies, mutilated, appeared all around me. I recognized the faces.

"Tamaki, Mori-senpai, Hunny-sempai, Kyouya-sempai, mom, dad, and lots of others. No you or Haruhi. Then it squeezed harder and I bled onto the floor. Then the person changed into you.

"Next time the creature took over and I killed of them and it repeated. A little while ago I saw... it's face," Kaoru explained, tearing up and trembling.

"Oh hell, I'd cut myself to stay away from that too!" Hikaru commented, shaking his head. "What did the face look like?"

"Ours only with a cut on the left cheek."

"Hmm..." Hikaru mused. "Maybe this dream is reffering to your behavior as of late?"

"It's not me!"

The grip choked Hikaru harder as Kaoru's sickness increased and spread. They continued to hold eachother none-the-less.

"Where's dad?" Kaoru asked, closing his eyes.

"At work!" Hikaru answered like Kaoru was an idiot for asking.

"No, '_dad_'."

"Oh, Lord?"

"Yes!"

"With the others somewhere."

"With Haruhi!" Kaoru teased.

Hikaru huffed at Kaoru's tease and held Kaoru closer. He smiled as the pain eased and he could tell something had gotten better for Kaoru too.

"Isn't she your girlfriend?" Kaoru whispered.

"Yeah. But you're my brother. You're higher on my importance scale, always have been," Hikaru replied just as soft. "Always will be."

"On my importance scale there's two categories," Kaoru replied. Suddenly he smiled greatly and hid his face. "Us and them."

"I wish it was that simple."

Kaoru sighed, "At least I'm the highest, right?"

"Yes, but now I think about how actions would affect others. That's why-"

"Would you run away with me?"

"Excuse me?"

"Would you run away? With me?"

"Of course not, they'd be sad."

Kaoru buried his head into Hikaru's shoulder and held him close.

"What if, I wanted..."

"Wanted what?" Hikaru asked curiously.

"...to die?"

Hikaru tried to keep his thoughts straight. As the words sunk in, Hikaru realized he was about to break down. He couldn't do that in front of Kaoru!

Hikaru shoved Kaoru off of him and ran into the hall into the huddled Host Club. He bent over, hiding his face. He couldn't stop thinking of Kaoru.

"He told me something," Hikaru huffed.

"Something he '_wanted_' or couldn't promise?" Tamaki quickly budged in.

Hikaru looked into Tamaki's eyes desperately and they made a connection. They both knew what Kaoru wanted and didn't know how to say it. But they both wanted Kaoru alive. The whole Host Club did, too.

Kaoru scowled, "I never said I _wanted_ to die. I just asked what he would do or say if I told him I wanted to die."

Kaoru sighed and remininsced.

"Do I want to die?"

He stared out the window and groaned. Did he really want to die?

"If Hikaru leaves me." He admitted finally.

Kaoru thought about his situation and how Hikaru WAS leaving him. He felt sicker and thought of going home. Then another thought hit him. He knocked on the window and gazed at the terrain before him.

"Maybe..." Kaoru leaned his forehead on to the window. "...I could, run away?"

His sick smile returned and he backed up, ready to thrust his whole body into the window.

A knockc froze him and he turned to stare at Nekozawa. Nekozawa was the leader of the Black Magic Club and couldn't be in the sun so he wore a cape outfit. Bezelnoff **((spelling?)) **rested on his hand, it was a cat puppet.

"You're having problems?" Nekozawa questioned.

"Why? Did someone curse me?" Kaoru growled.

"Only yourself."

Something gripped Karou's mind and he couldn't control himself again. "Who the hell do you think you are, huh?"

"Myself, something you can't accomplish?"

"You calling me inferior?" Kaoru countered angrily.

"Not really."

"You are!"

Things began becoming tints of red again. Kaoru wanted to hurl, but he couldn't control himself.

"I came to ask you what was wrong."

_Everything!_ Kaoru wanted to scream and cry. Everything was painful, hurting, five times worse than it normally would.

"Go to hell," Kaoru spat.

Nekozawa flinched, even people who opposed him never said that. Here was someone who even helped him once!

"That's not like you."

_IT ISN'T ME!_

"Of course it is, what do you know?" Kaoru laughed.

Hikaru almost threw open the door entirely and broke their cover.

"Stay calm," Mori replied, holding Hikaru's shoulder.

"Go to hell," Kaoru spat.

Everyone gasped quietly as they stared at Nekozawa's reaction.

"That's not like you," Nekozawa replied, not knowing how to react.

"Of course it is, what do you know?" Hikaru saw Kaoru laughed. He couldn't take this torture. "You know just as much as the others. Nothing."

"I heard a rumor..."

"Exactly, now get off my back. It was a damn rumor!"

"But Kaoru..."

"GET A CLUE!" Kaoru screamed at Nekozawa. Hikaru felt extremely sorry for Nekozawa.

"Is it true you want to die?" Nekozawa continued, almost unfazed.

Kaoru looked behind himself to the window.

"Depends who you ask," Kaoru replied almost too quietly.

"I just want an answer."

"Yes and no. I can't stand living yet I absolutely enjoy it."

"Who or what makes both of those reasons?"

"The same person. The person who I live for. The person who's killing me. The one who betrayed me and all my trust I gave him."

"Him?" Nekozawa asked, shocked.

"Him."

It cut Hikaru. He knew who "him" was. It was no one other than himself.

"I'm sorry," Hikaru sobbed as his legs gave out on him. The deep and painful grasp on his neck came back. "I'm so sorry."

Hikaru got up before the others could grab him and he dashed to Kaoru and embraced him. "I'M SORRY!"

The pain and sickness for both dissapated and Kaoru hugged his brother, shocked. He smiled and felt at ease again, he forgot anyone was there.

Tamaki and the others onlooked. Haruhi's chest hurt but she smiled just like Tamaki did.

"I'm glad they're okay," Hikaruhi admitted.

"Me too," Tamaki whispered.

"I just..."

"You don't want Kaoru-kun to have Hikaru-kun?" Tamaki asked, surprised.

Haruhi blushed and looked away. Tamaki could tell there was somehting she wasn't telling. She _DID_ like Hikaru, right? A thought so shocking hit Tamaki that he blurted it without thinking, "Or is that you're jealous that Hikaru-kun has Kaoru-kun?"

"Of course not!" Haruhi snapped. "That's out-RAGOUS! Why would I like KAORU?"

"I dunno," Tamaki shrugged. "just a thought."

_Haruhi? Like me? _Kaoru sneered, he stared at her.

"Well that's not it!" Haruhi blushed angrily. "Ick!"

Kaoru smirked as he controlled the sick pleasure and restrained it to be his. At least for the moment, anyway.

"Is there something wrong with liking me?" Kaoru whined.

"I don't!" Haruhi growled.

"You're not usually this fiest about something, Haruhi. Even in fights you don't act like this," Hikaru noted, turning around, but still holding Kaoru's hand.

"And I never said you did like me," Kaoru giggled.

His heart throbbed and he felt sick, yet like he was on top of the world. He wanted more. Was this what kids got when they picked on others? It was tasty, addictive.

Haruhi blushed and looked away.

"Do you like Kao-kun or something, Haruhi-chan?" Hunny asked, big-eyed.

"Yes, I'm curious as well, it does seem like you have a crush on Kaoru-kun," Kyouya agreed.

"Me too," Mori nodded.

"N-no!" Haruhi stumbled.

Kaoru thought about it and gazed longingly at Hikaru. If Haruhi did liked him, Hikaru would probaly want him to date Haruhi. Then he might fall in love with her and lose Hikaru forever. _Oh what the hell, I'm losing him already._

"Hikaru?" Kaoru asked in his normal, girly tone again.

"Yes, Kaoru?" Hikaru looked at his twin.

"Let's go home."

_Let's run away, _is what Hikaru's eyes said. But Kaoru knew Hikaru was just trying to make up for his actions.

"Let me take you away," Hikaru replied, hardly joking. He kissed their entwined hands.

Hikaru tried to untangle his fingers and give a good-bye kiss to Haruhi. Finally Hikaru let go and he "skipped" to Haruhi and kissed her cheek.

"Leave my brother alone," Hikaru teased. Haruhi blushed and smiled.

Kaoru closed his eyes and cried silently so no one would pay attention to him. He thought of the nightmare which went away everytime Hikaru held him. But he knew it would haunt him.

Even when he was awake.


	6. Happily Ever After? Not Quite Yet

**My 'longest' chapter yet, lol. Jk, it's my shortest one yet. I was hesitant on letting it stop here, but hey, who cares right? Besides, I don't know when I'll be back on so I'm flooding these on here. Still love to hear ideas.**

"Today ws, wow!" Hikaru laughed and sat next to Kaoru.

Kaoru faked a big smile, "Yeah!"

"I think, she's the one," Hikaru announced to Kaoru. Kaoru choked and kept his forced smile.

"The one?" Kaoru asked quietly to keep from crying.

"I wanna be with her forever!" Hikaru admitted.

"I-I'm so... happy for you."

"Who's your 'one'?"

Kaoru gazed at him like Kaoru'd done something wrong. He felt guilty. How could Kaoru tell his brother, his twin at that, that he wanted to spend his life with him?

"I can't tell you."

"Why not?" Hikaru urged. "Is it a guy? It's okay."

Kaoru couldn't take it anymore. He was about to break permanetly. Kaoru was tired of being glued back into some damn form that fell apart everytime he breathed or even thought! "I can't take it!"

"Take what?"

"I LOVE you, Hikaru!" Kaoru sobbed.

"Ha, I love you, too," Hikaru laughed uncomfortably.

"Nooo! You're my ONE!" Kaoru sobbed uncontrollably. "I LOVE you!"

Haruhi and Tamaki peered through the door. Hunny, Mori, and Kyouya were distracting the Hitachiin parents. Haruhi sighed.

"But we're brothers!" Hikaru protested. "It's not right, you-"

"Damn me to hell then!" Kaoru sobbed. "I love you! Love, love, love, love you!"

"Kaoru!" Hikaru snapped. "Stop it! RIGHT NOW!"

"No," Kaoru cried. "I won't, I love you!"

"You can't!" Hikaru snarled.

"I know I can't!" Kaoru whined, leaning on the wall. "I can't anymore!"

"What?"

"I can't take it!"

"What can't you take?"

"It hurts..." Kaoru whined as he felt sick all over again. He couldn't stop crying, he had to let it all out for once. Somehow. "It hurts!"

"Kaoru!" Hikaru scowled angrily. "Shut-up! DAMMIT! WE CAN'T! WE **WON'T**!"

"I'll die then."

Hikaru stopped.

"I'll die without you. I SWEAR it. Wehter I die from loneliness, jealousy, or myself. I WILL die," Kaoru growled. "Then for once you'll be sorry. Then you'll love me for once."

"Kaoru..."

"What do I have to sacrifice to make you love me? My soul? I'd gladly do it!" Kaoru sobbed again. "I want you to love me like I love you."

Hikaru embraced Kaoru and wiped away his tears.

"I really do love you," Hikaru admitted. "I was afraid you'd hate me or get taken away from me. I thought you were teasing me a moment ago and I was about to admit my feelings."

"Hikaru?"

"Yes, Kaoru?"

"If I died, would you follow?"

Hikaru laughed. "I wouldn't run away with you but I would die with you."

"Good, you have to keep that promise forever."

"I will, Kaoru, I will."

They looked into eachother's eyes.

_I love you, _they both said.

"I CAN READ YOU!" Kaoru exclaimed happily. He hung around Hikaru's neck in joy.

"So?"

"We're not disconnected anymore?"

"Poor Haruhi."

"You always have liked Kaoru-kun better, haven't you?" Tamaki chuckled quietly.

Haruhi blushed and mumbled something.

"I knew it!"

"I'll admit!" Haruhi gave in and said it loud enough so everyone in the area could hear. "I like Kaoru more than Hikaru!"Kaoru smiled and blushed.

"I l-lo-lov-like you a lot Kaoru."

"You're still one of them."

Hikaru and Kaoru laughed jovialy, reunited for awhile at least.


	7. Important

**IMPORTANT**

****

** My computer broke down and everything, so I'm really sorry and I'll update all my stories when I get back.  
Don't get mad at this post because I promise that it'll be replaced by the next chapter. Just hold on tight please! I'm sorry if this is against the rules, but it's odd to see someone who updated so much suddenly just stop, and I wanted to explain why it's like this. I'm sorry again and I will update the moment I get my computer fixed.**

**I'm on my Aunt's at the moment, but she's leaving now, so I won't be updating at all until I get my computer back unless something miraculous happens. Again, I apologize about this update right here, it's probably not what anyone was expecting, was it?**

**RizaMustang24**


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